


Who Could Be Sweeter?

by CrimesOfADeadpool



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Cheerleaders, Crossdressing, Established Relationship, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-29
Updated: 2015-07-29
Packaged: 2018-04-11 20:48:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4451840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrimesOfADeadpool/pseuds/CrimesOfADeadpool
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wade decides to make Peter's dream come true. You know the one. With the cheerleading outfit?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Who Could Be Sweeter?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sciderman](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sciderman/gifts).



> _Happy birthday Sci!! Enjoy the next exactly four months of being a year older than me._  
>  So it's Sciderman's birthday, and I said I'd write them a few fics for it, (which they seemed really happy about, idk why, my fics are like???) and so yes, here's the first one. (You still have two prompts though Sci, so I guess I'm writing you three b'day fics)

Peter narrowly dodged the incoming attack.  
_Why, oh, why, do the lame villains always happen to me?_ He wondered as he swung out of the way. _Daredevil has a crime boss and at least two different assassins. Wolverine had a feral mutant, a shapeshifter and an evil brother._  
He had an octopus themed scientist, a rhino themed guy and… and whatever this was supposed to be.  
“Flower power!” The apparently Power-Puff Girls themed villain shrieked at him as she threw a bunch of flower explosives at him.  
He let himself fall onto the nearest roof, landing neatly on the top and folding his arms.  
“Seriously, we should be friends,” Peter said, continuing his usual ‘let’s see how much ribbing one villain can take before they go insane’. “There’s like nursery rhymes about gardens and spiders.”  
The girl laughed. “Yes, yes, incy wincy spider, gets blown away!” She threw some more explosives and Peter jumped to a safer rooftop, and that’s when he saw… it.  
“Wade?” he said confusedly to himself, before having to jump away to another spot to dodge another attack.  
“Aw, poor spidey, getting tired?” the girl purred in her too-high voice.  
“I never tire of badly remembered nursery rhymes,” Peter told her distractedly.  
That couldn’t have been…  
No.  
The girl must be releasing some sort of drug or something.  
Wade was _not dressed like a cheerleader on the roof of some building with a set of pom-poms and a stereo._  
It just wasn’t possible.  
The girl scoffed at him. “Creative licence,” she squealed.  
He jumped back, and he caught glimpse of the figure on the roof again. That _was_ Wade.  
Singing. And cheering. Bobbing up and down with the High School Musical soundtrack.  
Peter was so shocked he almost got hit by one of the girl’s explosions.  
He shook his head. Fight now, Wade later, he told himself.  
Peter saw his opening and went for it. Five minutes later the girl was webbed up and singing about Little Miss Muffet’s tuffets or something.  
Peter watched her get taken away before swinging back up.  
He couldn’t get the image out of his head.  
It had to be a delusion right? A hallucination.  
Then again, it was _Wade_.  
He groaned loudly and began swinging back to the scene of the fight.  
  
XXX  
  
“There you are!” Wade waved him over.  
In a cheerleader outfit.  
With pom-poms.  
And Gwen Stefani singing in the background.  
Peter dropped next to him.  
“Why?”  
Wade grinned at him and waved the pom-poms in his face. “I’m making your dreams come true!”  
“This is not my dream.”  
“Ooh, don’t you remember? It was-”  
“Wade,” Peter cut him off.  
“Well, it wasn’t a dream dream,” Wade said. “But you can pretend it was a dream dream.” He put his pom-poms over his heart. “If we shadows have offended, think but this, and all is mended, that you have but slumber'd here, while these visions did appear.”  
Peter blinked at him. “Was that… Wade, was that Shakespeare?”  
Wade nodded happily. “Nice, right? Sophisticated. That sort of stuff turns you on, doesn’t it, my beloved nerd?”  
Peter raised an eyebrow. “You got it from that BriTANic episode, right?”  
Wade pouted dramatically until Peter sighed.  
He gave Wade a proper once-over. “It does look nice,” he offered.  
Wade grinned and stepped closed. “The best part,” he whispered in Peter’s ear. “Is, per cheerleader code, I’m not wearing any underwear.”  
Peter bit his lip. “I don’t think that’s Cheerleader Code.”  
Wade gently planted a kiss on Peter’s masked lips. “Shows what you know about cheerleaders.” He stepped away, wiggling his hips suggestively as he did so. “I’ve come up with a bunch of cheers,” he told him happily. He waved his arms. _“That’s our man, who could be sweeter? There he is, we call him-”_  
“Wade!” Peter hissed, looking around.  
“ _Spider-Man_ ,” Wade finished in a blather, looking hurt. “Do you not like my rhyme?”  
Peter slapped his own forehead. “Wade, what are you doing?”  
Wade looked down at his outfit. “I’ll have you know that a lot of people would find this a very romantic and sexy gesture.”  
Peter rolled his eyes and pulled up his mask, reaching out to twist his fingers into Wade’s dress and pull him close so he could kiss him properly. It _was_ a romantic gesture, in true Wade Wilson fashion, and it _was_ admittedly sexy, in a way only Wade in a dress could achieve.  
“I’ve got a bunch more cheers, if that turns you on,” Wade said in a low voice.  
Peter chuckled. “Sounds scary.”  
“I’ve planned our whole evening out in cheers,” Wade continued. “One for dinner, one for video games, one for sleeping, one for showering. One for S.E.X.” He coughed to himself and stood back. “I mean,” he raised the pom-poms and with each letter thrust them into the air. “S. E. X. Hurray!” He jumped into the air.  
Peter couldn’t help grinning. “Seriously, what bought this on?”  
Wade shrugged. “I’m a super nice person.” He looked sheepish. “Also I needed a new dress after you tore the last one.”  
Peter flushed. The last one. It had been a valiant struggle, but apparently nothing could keep Peter from getting Wade naked when he was in a mood. It had been a shame too, since that was one of his favourite dresses.  
“Oh.” He said smally.  
Wade grinned and slung an arm over his shoulders. “No harm done. Except to the dress, of course, but I’ve got this one now, so I guess it’s okay, may even work out better in the end, who knows, did you say something about taking me home and fucking me? I’m sure someone mentioned it, we should get on that immediately, you know, cos underwear-less dresses surprisingly leave nothing to the imagination.”  
Peter made a noise. “No one said that Wade.”  
Wade gasped and dropped his pom-poms. “You don’t have to be cruel Peter.”  
Peter laughed and stepped towards him, placed his hands on Wade’s shoulders and stepped onto his tip toes so he could kiss him. “Did you want to go home so I could fuck you?”  
Wade pretended to swoon, and it was only Peter’s super-strength which kept him from dropping him on the floor. “Oh, so romantic Spidey baby.”  
Peter laughed and kissed him again. “Let’s go home.”

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry Sci, this basically became the spideypool fic personification of our earlier conversation, complete with badly remembered rhymes and Shakespeare and, most importantly, cheerleaderpool. 
> 
> What do you guys mean my cheers suck? You suck. 
> 
> [The BriTANick thing is here. ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mephJf3-zYE) It's only four minutes long and it has Danny Pudi (Abed from Community, the Janitor in CA:TWS) and everyone should watch BriTANick cos they're awesome??


End file.
